Why hasn't it been awhile since I've written my thoughts/writings here.

Valentine's Day has passed and on that day, I wrote a very badly written love story. Well, at least it started out fine, the details just slowly ceased to exist. I'm never much of a person to really follow through with projects when I have a lack of motivation to finish it. But with these short stories, I have to finish it no matter how bad my writing gets. So here goes, and if you want to continue reading after that, I'll fill y'all in on my life. Hah!
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Be Mine.


The man walked into the decorated room with his hands on the hips of two girls, seemingingly attatched to his hip. And off these two girls were another two, all were dressed finely in short black dresses,were adorned with roses in their hair, and were glistened with diamonds. The man had eclectic taste as he always walked with at least two or more girls, he was known for his bachelor status. No one was exactly sure where he got these women, how he got them, and why he did, because no same woman returned to the next party. For this gathering, it was a Valentine's Day celebration, for couples and singles alike. The clock stroke midnight as they walked in and a man introduced him as Raleigh for he had always disliked formalities.

It had been six and a half years since he had last seen her.
78 months.
2373 days.
56952 hours.
3417120 minutes.

He could go on, but he forced his mind to stop as the group walked through the murmuring crowd of equally rich if not lesser guests at the party. Many were jealous of Raleigh for although he wasn't well known for what he owned, it was how he owned it. May it be from oil to women, people were in awe. At the age of 26, he stormed into the business market and established himself as a wealthy, responsible businessman, but he had the social life of a spoiled teenager with a bottomless amount of credit. He was always in the spotlight, teen and business magazines, interviews, scandals, yet he always had an air of mystery. With any personal question he solely answered to satisfy the question and nothing more.

After meeting that one girl in high school, he continuously argued himself for giving up that one chance at graduation to be with her. He was determined after that to follow the saying of money can buy happiness, yet it was never reached. He always felt unhappy, but he can't complain much, he has an envious collection of expensive cars, a new woman every night, and a never ending supply of money. Raleigh tried and tired to push that girl to the back of his mind, but failed miserably.

Two of the girls left to the standing bar, giggling arm in arm. Raleigh reached his designated table that was to be shared with four other people, but there were only three sitting across the table. The two girls left sat on either side of him, and each began playful banter with guests sitting at the neighboring table. The three gaped in wonder and in confusion, why would such a man bring a girl, why even four girls and never converse with them? They each wore an expression of such confusion that caught Raleigh's eyes immediately.

He laughed, his voice was melodic, as he ran a hand through his short brown hair casually. Raleigh physically, looked normal, like any average joe, but he took pride in his voice. "To answer that question. I don't know." He looked at the faces sitting across from him, a married couple to his left and a young woman to his right. "So how long were you all married?" he cocked his head in genuine wonder.

"A-ah!" the man stuttered at the sudden question, "u-uh."

His wife touched his arm lightly in comfort and smiled, "Just last month actually. It's been so surreal." She looked into her husband's eyes and let out a light laugh at her husband's lack of words and they laughed it off, only to start an intimate conversation.

Raleigh turned his attention to the girl, opened his mouth to ask a question, but the words choked up in his throat. The young girl sitting in front of him looked a little too familiar. He cocked his head the other way as if scruitinizing the girl a little too closely.

The girl shifted in her seat uncomfortably and replied, "Excuse me? May I help you?" She held herself with wonderful posture, the tight-fitting purple dress brough out her bright brown eyes, and wavy dark brown hair was styled into a messy bun that fitted her angular face.

After a short pause he regained his composure, "Oh I'm sorry, but I think I've seen you before."

"Oh?" she asked in a beautiful tenor voice. "Well if not, my name is Madison Trent. You are?"

His eyes widened in shock, it couldn't be. "Madison, it's me, your friend in, oh wait, er, you probably don't remember me, but I remember you, I'm sorry that sounds horrible, uh, I'm from high school, Raleigh," he said flustered.

She gasped and touched his hand lightly, "Raleigh?! It's been years! How long has it been? Uh, six or so years?"

He laughed, "Oh, around there. How have you been? I want to know everything!" He hadn't felt this excited in so long, he wanted to catch this uncatchable woman for his own. Raleigh leaned his elbows on his table and rested his hand on one hand, awaiting her stories of the past, present, and future.

The two talked for quite some time, but it was merely about an hour. The married couple left to go dance and the four girls Raleigh entered with were each mingling with other rich bachelors who wanted to get lucky. Raleigh haven't smiled nor laughed like this in years and his heart was beating fast. He felt as if he has returned to the past and that he is going to get a second chance on what he missed.

Raleigh was about to ask Madison to go out the next evening when a young man emerged from the crowd and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Hey Madison," he said in a deep voice.

She turned her head and looked up at the man behind her. "Oh hey Brad, I was wondering where you went." She outstretched her arm to bring the man closer and kissed him on the cheek. "Brad, this is Raleigh, an old friend from high school. Raleigh, Brad," she smiled.

Raleigh stood and shook the man's hand, but his heart was aching. He was tempted to grab this Brad by the collar and get rid of him through any means possible. The shook hands and he returned to his seat with clenched fists under the table.

"Madison, let's go dance, we've got a whole night ahead of us," Brad insisted.

"Oh okay. I'll talk to you later Raleigh, okay?" she asked, rising from her seat.

He faked a smile and nodded, "Yeah. Sure."

He watched them walk off into the crowd of people, their hands entertwined as he leaned back in his chair. He then arose from his empty table and walked out of the room, no matter how much he wanted her. He wanted her to be happy.

Happy Belated Valentine's Day.
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I've given up on trying to find what some call love at such a young age. I fail to see the point. Sure, dating is used to help experience the need for a relationship. Practice, I'd like to call it. The oddity of this is that I'm the person people go to when they need help with relationships. There's always a stark difference of being in one and being observant of others. I've always criticized people for being unable to feel empathy. It's a nitpicky thing that never ceases to annoy. But I can't blame them, they just don't understand.

I've yet to understand it myself, but I try.

Throughout this month or so, I've become more open with myself. Realizing that one would not be able to understand others, if you wouldn't allow people to understand you. I still make it hard for people to get to know me, but I try really hard to answer questions about myself when they are honestly asked.

Why there are still walls people will have to scale.

But no matter. I like to keep it that way.

A friend asked me why we (high school students) should go to college.

My first thought and answer to that question was that without a degree, it's pretty hard to get a well paying job unless you were genius. (Of course this is only my opinion.) But he pointed out that it wasn't a good enough reason to go. If we all had a choice, would we really go to college? So I replied, well college is a bridge into adulthood where we will have to work and find our own way in life, no matter how pathetic our life may seem to be. My ultimate thought on college is that it's a waste of time before the real world, or a way to take in the world a bit at a time...

which is a lie. Us "younger people" take in as much as the world as the adults do. We just don't have a say.

Which leads into another conversation with a group of friends. As we were in class, not doing our work as usual, we got into a heated debate of our generation, or rather; the one we're born in.

Research it: Generation Y. Wikipedia is pretty good. Haha.

We have established that we are the most balanced group of people politically wise (more moderates) and ideawise (learned to accept). We were born to be old enough to witness the improvements in technology and embrace that, as well as live through the september eleventh attack, increase in interracial coupling, increase of tuition for colleges, the rise and fall of oil prices, economic crisis, the election of the first black male president, etc etc.

As we were talking, we then realize that it won't be long until we'll have to help change the world. We've been taught since young to think outside the box, to think of new ideas to help save the world, to solve problems in the community, the idea-makers. What pisses me off is that it always gets worse before it gets better. I'm not saying I have the greatest ideas at all, but a lot of my friends do. Listening to them gives me a slim chance of hope for the future. That being said, I'm almost hoping to grow up faster so that our voices can be heard.

Who would listen to a sixteen to seventeen year old high school student? Really. Who would? We're teenagers, the people who are not responsible, not in-tune with the news, unable to take care of ourselves, etc etc. Yet we care for our future.

For now, I know many who get away from everything. Run away and live in the country forever, to live in peace. Who want to run away from the troubles and stresses of just wondering what kind of world we will live in the future. But we can't run away, because that's just telling the world that people who was made to help has given up. What has the world come down to?